Fierce Love is believing that everyone, including you, is worthy of love, at all times.
Everyone… is worthy of love… at all times.
In any moment we are either choosing fear or love. Very often it’s an unconscious reaction to life circumstances, based on conditioning, past experiences and wounds.
Fear tends to put us into fight, flight or freeze mode. It creates contraction and tension in the body. There can be resistance, protection, defensiveness, righteousness, projection and judgement. It can be turned inward on yourself or outward onto others or life itself. Fear creates separation and difference.
Love feels open, expansive and spacious in the body. Energy flows freely. There is complete ownership and responsibility for yourself. There’s a sense of “live and let live”, giving others the space to be themselves. There’s a welcoming of life. Love heals through connection, understanding and compassion. It flows through vulnerability and honesty.
Everyone has their own story, their own path and their own challenges. They are doing what they can with what they’ve got, including their inner resources, their pain, their ignorance and their confusion. Even if their actions and words may seem wrong or inflict pain on you or others, can you still hold a place in your heart to love them?
This is Fierce Love.
Fierce Love is staying open in a state of love even when you’re not receiving love back or being give any good reason to love.
I believe it’s possible to express anger from a place of love. It’s possible to not agree with someone’s actions or perspective, and still hold them in love. It’s possible to be in a state of empowered self-love even when you feel guilt or shame or fear.
I don’t believe it’s easy! But I believe it’s possible.
Fierce Love is a conscious, empowered and embodied state of being, whereby love is unconditional, human and universal.
When I drop deeply into meditation with myself and with life, when everything else is removed, all I find is love. That’s all that remains. That’s all that I am and that we all are. Love.
Love is what we are made of. It’s our true nature.
I want to know then how to make that real in every day life. If in my deepest core and in my heart of heart’s I know that I am love, and that we are all that, how do we make that our experience of life and each other? How do we hold true to that when it seems that it’s more common to meet fear, our own and others?
I don’t have the perfect answer. I often get it wrong.
My longing, however, is to learn. I want to live my life through love not fear.
I commit myself entirely to learning what it takes to keep choosing love. The conscious ‘want’, I believe, is at least the first step.
It hurts to experience anything else other than love. Whether I create that myself, or experience it in relationship to another person, or witness it in life, it’s painful.
It feels painful and destructive to hold anything else in my body and in my heart. And yet I have done. And yet I do. But my longing is to move away from that. To bring consciousness and awareness to what I am choosing. To work out what is fierce love, to work out what it takes to love fiercely in life.
There’s a part of me that wants to hide away and make my life really safe and comfortable, so that I can’t be hurt. It serves me well quite often to create my own world where I can ride my rainbow unicorn!! And sometimes that place is the only place from which I can continue to fill up on love and bring it out into the world. Yet I realise that at times the hiding away from life’s messiness is fear not love.
It takes fierce perseverance, determination, courage and self-worthiness to keep facing fear and choosing love. This is why I call it fierce love.
Fierce Love is making decisions, speaking the truth, and taking inspired and courageous action that honours your own divinity, your heart, and your goodness.
Can you have your heart broken and yet not close down in fear and protection, not become bitter or vengeful, and not blame or judge? It’s not about accepting or being ok with wrong-doing or any act that is not of love toward you. Rather, it is loving yourself so much that you choose to speak your truth and walk away. You choose to close that door in order to be able to stay in a state of love – open, spacious and free in yourself. You move away while at the same time holding the other person with love and wishing them well.
Life kindly gives us opportunities and situations where it seems difficult to love and where we are tested to dig deeper into the well of love to discover that it is in fact infinite.
Love is the one thing that has no limit.
It can be difficult to love ourselves at times. But not loving yourself is simply a continuation of the fear and violence outside, and therefore allowing it to continue within gives it reason to exist outside.
If we want more love in the world outside we must first start with more love within.
A sensitive heart, like mine, longs for nothing more that to love and be loved. The sensitive heart feels the world deeply. And so those of us who feel deeply are often the first to learn, at a young age, to protect and shut out the tremendous pain and discomfort of this confused reality that has lost touch with love.
Yet we need more sensitive hearts. More wholehearted people, willing to speak out and act from love and for love.
Let’s not allow the fear defeat and kill the love and compassion. Rather, let’s get together to acknowledge and feel stronger in love. Let’s use the messiness and intensity of life, not to build up walls of protection and separation, but rather to bring us together to learn love, grace, adaptability, humility, curiosity, and humour.
I call us to come together to learn what it means to love fiercely.
So I call together those of us who want this; those of us who have the courage to try and to seek; those of us who know in our hearts that we are good, that we are love and we have a longing to make that manifest in our actions, words, thoughts, in how we live our lives, and in how we relate to others.
I call us together to sit together to learn and practice this together. This is a vulnerable and courageous path for it opens us up. It sheds light on the shadow, the ego and the monkey mind. It sheds light on what’s not working, as well as on the truth that unites us and that pulls us together.
This is a path that is honest, authentic, messy, beautiful, exhilarating. It’s not the easy one. It’s beyond the comfort zone.
For many of us there is no choice, because the only way for us to live in our truth is to live in love, fierce love.
ARE YOU READY TO EXPERIENCE FIERCE LOVE?
Join me and Niels Madsen at the upcoming Fierce Love Retreat.
Book your place: firstname.lastname@example.org